Holding fast...

New memory verse for the second half of March:

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess,
for He who promised is faithful.
Hebrews 10:23

In these uncertain days, when we are bombarded with images of brokenness; things and lives swept away, I am comforted by the picture of holding "unswervingly" - steady, constant, unshakable, resolute. And not holding onto something flimsy or unsubstantial, but to the hope we profess.

I love the Amplified Bible's translation of this verse:

"So let us seize and hold fast
and retain without wavering
the hope we cherish and confess
and our acknowledgment of it,
for He Who promised is reliable (sure)
and faithful to His word."

This hope is not a vague, fuzzy, wishful feeling, but a firm belief, an expectation based on the reliable, sure and faithful God. What is that "hope" - that expectation?

He is God.
He is always good.
And we are always loved.
Always.

Praying that in these dark days, God's presence will be made manifest in the lives of those hurting in Japan. (If you're looking for a way to give, here's a wonderful group that is already on the ground and providing relief in the hardest hit areas.)

Holding fast, unswervingly, on this day.

Thankful...on this gray day...

...on this gray, rainy day, I am thankful.

I am also heartbroken with every picture and devastating bit of news from Japan. How can I reconcile these terrible pictures with my safe, comfortable world? Although I am not promised tomorrow, on this day, my children are safe, my home secure. There is no swift, horrible current bearing down on us, ripping our lives to shreds. Two things come to mind:

• The song we practiced in choir practice last night, one of my favorites -- Blessed Be Your Name, by Matt Redman. Here's the second verse: "Blessed be Your name, when the sun's shining down on me, when the world's all as it should be, blessed be Your name. Blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering, though there's pain in the offering, blessed be Your name."
And the chorus (or is it the bridge?) gets me every time:

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say,
"Lord, blessed be Your name."

(Job 1:21)

• Also, a devotional quoted by Ann Voskamp in 1000 Gifts:

"Here dies another day
During which I have had eyes, ears, hands
And the great world round me;
And with tomorrow begins another.
Why am I allowed two?"

There is a fatalistic streak in me that can't help but wonder why I have been spared when others are suffering. And yet, I know this to be true - I must give thanks in everything. To withhold thanks for the everyday graces does not lessen the suffering of others. If I can find the gift, give thanks, receive the grace, the joy, the gift will pass from me to others. That is the small - and huge - thing we are called to do: receive God's blessings...and pass them on.

So, determinedly, feeling oh-so-small on this day, I am thankful...

...for Lent...for remembering
...a new baby, perfect
...new parents, nervous, happy
...new grandparents, ecstatic
...a spontaneous road trip with my daughter
...conversation, meaningful
...mama's kitchen...and her table
...a hug from Matthew
...friends who know me...and still love
...a difficult phone call, made
...Deuteronomy...finished!
...the planting that is completed
...the green shoots, just-emerging
...women, gathered to study, to share life
...quiet time in a quiet house with my quiet husband...
...believing He holds everything...He always loves...He is always good...

Incline my heart...

It's March 1 (who can believe it?), which means it's time to start memorizing a new Scripture.

(Quick confession: I'm kind of behind. I keep choosing Scriptures and moving forward, but I haven't nailed down the last couple. Just keeping it real. I plan to knuckle down and get after it!)

Anyway, the verses I've chosen for the next two weeks were inspired by the new Bible study we're doing at FBC Wisner - Jonah - Navigating a Life Interrupted by Priscilla Shirer. In the video for Session 2, Priscilla was talking about our "want-to," our feelings, and how we let them keep us from obedience when God "interrupts" our lives. Jonah just plain didn't want to go to Ninevah. He was probably looking around at the other prophets and wondering why their call seemed easier. He was comfortable where he was. (Ouch!) And he flat out ran away. Even though we don't always physically run, we sometimes delay obedience (also known as "disobedience") or grudgingly go through the motions while our hearts and minds have boarded a ship bound for Tarshish.

One of the Scriptures Priscilla used was Psalm 119:36-37:

Turn my heart toward your statutes
and not toward selfish gain.
Turn my eyes away from worthless things;
preserve my life according to your word.

Priscilla said David turned his "want-to" over to God. Knowing full well the inclination of his own heart, he ask God to turn it...to incline it toward Him and away from selfishness. I love that we don't have to fake a "want-to," a desire to do what is right. God knows the inclination of our heart. We can ask Him to shape it, to turn it, to make it right. When we lack the will to "turn our eyes away from worthless things," we can ask God to do it. Hmmm.

"Preserve my life" is translated in other versions as "revive me in your ways" and "restore to me vigorous life and health in your ways" and "give me life in your ways." I want that. Right now.

And I love how many times (in Psalm 119 especially) David asked God to do something "according to your word" or "according to your promise" and "according to your steadfast love." Knowing God's word, knowing how well we are loved, can give us peace and assurance when we ask Him for anything "according to His word."

I'd love to know what you're learning in God's Word this week, or what you're memorizing and why!

Thankful today...for beauty

Numbering some gifts
on a beautiful almost-spring day...
• Hiking along an ancient creek
(with dearly loved ones)

• Cooking with Jesse and Jessica...

• Close friends crowded around a table
filled with good things...
• Words that bring conviction...
• Enough...
• And in my backyard...a pear tree,
blooming white...a promise of spring...

• And bright bits of yellow...

• And lush, soft green...

• A bright new rug, welcoming at the back door...

• Cut flowering branches,
bringing spring indoors...

...wishing you a grace-filled almost-spring day...

Counting gifts on the farm...

It's almost-spring and in addition to getting ready to plant hundreds of acres of corn and cotton, we're experimenting with a little garden spot. On this gorgeous almost-spring day, I counted gifts...

119. The good, dark earth.

120. Jesse...every day...

121. The promise of fresh veggies...


121. A beautiful tree...budding...

122. Gorgeous blue skies...

123. Unexpected beauty...in the weeds...

Yes, these are weeds. Hen bit to be precise. A very bad weed when it's encroaching on your crops, but, when you take a closer look...

...it's really beautiful. Finding beauty in the weeds...like looking for the gift in the not-so-beautiful times of life...


(Oh, and one more for fun!)


124. A soft, gray, sleeping farm cat...

Counting gifts...

Still working on counting gifts...receiving all as grace. (See this post for more explanation!) On Mondays, I'm joining a group of others in sharing some of the gifts I'm thankful for in this season. I'd love to know what you're counting today!

104. Young mothers.
105. Baby slobber.
106.Cool, smooth sheets.
107.Wisdom for the moment.
108. Truck naps.
109. Velvety soft cat paws.
110. Breezy days, open windows.
111. Church potluck.
112. Sweet goodbyes...

"Gratitude is the most fruitful way of deepening your consciousness that you are...a divine choice..." Henri Nouwen

"Count blessings and discover Who can be counted on..." Ann Voskamp

*Confession - I feel compelled to confess that I'm struggling somewhat in this discipline of practicing eucharisteo - naming gifts, giving thanks, receiving grace and joy. I have a tendency to rack up a spiritual "to do" list, as though checking boxes off a list will please God. (Crazy, right? Is this a firstborn thing or a Type A personality thing? I do not know!) Anyway, I don't know who is reading this or why I felt the need for a little "full disclosure," but I don't want to give the false impression that I have a "handle" on anything...I'm just struggling...looking for grace in the moments...trying to be fully present, truly thankful, resting in God's wildly unreasonable love for me...

One thousand gifts...

I've been putting off this post...intimidated somehow. I've read a book that is so poetic and so life-changing that writing about it makes me feel completely inadequate.

The book is One Thousand Gifts - A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are by Ann Voskamp and it has taken my breath away. In a nutshell, Ann, a Canadian farm wife, accepted a dare to record 1000 things she loves - 1000 gifts from God. The process became a hunt for the beautiful in the every day - and a deepening awareness of God's love expressed in the microscopic and the magnificent.

The heart of the book lies in discovering and understanding eucharisteo - a word used to describe Jesus' giving of thanks hours before his death. "He gave thanks" - eucharisteo. The root word of eucharisteo is charis, meaning grace. As Ann writes, "Jesus took the bread, and saw it as grace and gave thanks. He took the bread and knew it to be gift and gave thanks."

Ann continues, "Eucharisteo - thanksgiving, includes the Greek word for grace, charis, but also holds its derivative, the Greek word chara, meaning joy...is it that simple? Is the height of my chara joy dependent on the depths of my eucharisteo thanks?"

The entwined threads of grace, thanksgiving and joy form the refrain of the book - a deep searching for deepest communion with God by simply receiving all as gift - the beautiful and, sometimes, the ugly-beautiful, because...well, life is hard.

So, I accepted the dare, took up pen and began my own hunt for the gifts - not always profound or poetic or spiritual - but gifts -- all gift, all grace. It's a discipline, this search for grace, this giving of thanks. Ann quotes Erasmus (as I...um...often do...) "A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit." The habit of ingratitude - or just inattention -- must be driven out by a habit of eucharisteo.

I love her repeated refrain, backed up with Scripture after Scripture - "Eucharisteo precedes the mirace." So, in the middle of a mess, in the middle of chaos or tragedy, can I look for the gift? Can I accept all as grace and expect the miracle? The miracle of joy...of love? Recounting the gifts is receiving God's love and returning it in thanks and praise - the joy results because this is what we were created for.

Far too often, I have (as Ann says) "slapped a sloppy brush of thanksgiving over everything in my life, which left me deeply thankful for very few things." In the naming, the counting, we experience the joy.

"Do not disdain the small. The whole of life - even the hard - is made up of the minute parts, and if I miss the infinitesimals, I miss the whole," Ann writes.

Okay, I could quote the whole book, but I won't...I encourage you to read it. These are just glimpses of the first three of eleven startling chapters. I leave you with one more passage, then a few of the gifts I'm thankful for...

"And this, this is the only way to slow time: When I fully enter time's swift current, enter into the current moment with the weight of all my attention, I slow the torrent with the weight of me all here. I can slow the torrent by being all here. I only live the full life when I live fully in the moment...Giving thanks for one thousand things is ultimately an invitation to slow time down with the weight of full attention...it's not the gifts that fulfill, but the holiness of the space. The God in it...thanks makes now a sanctuary."

My list (now at 87) includes...

warm bread, fresh from the oven (and real butter!)

...coffee, prepared by Jesse...

...flannel pajamas...and a freshly-made bed...

...family...and family photos, sweet company in an empty nest...

...a favorable wind...texts from my kids...rain-soaked fields...stars in a clear, black sky...empty laundry baskets...a fragment of time to read in the truck...rain on tin roof...leftovers...

My Scripture memory for the first two weeks in February reflects this season of learning:

"Pray diligently.
Stay alert with eyes wide open in gratitude."
Col. 4:2

For the rest of February, I'm also focusing on thanks:

"At all times and for everything,
giving thanks
in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ
to God the Father." Eph. 5:20

I find myself literally adopting a posture of hands lifted, open, as I look with new eyes for the gifts all around me. I'm accepting the dare to live fully, right where I am.